Homer Simpson is easily one of the most influential, infamous, and idiotic characters in television history.
This is a guy who once said “oh, they have internet on computers now!” and “With $10,000, we’d be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like…love!” I love the man, but he is clearly not the sharpest tool in the shed.
The longest running television sitcom ever, The Simpsons has always cranked out twenty-two minutes worth of hilarious comedy every Sunday night. Funny story: I wasn’t allowed to watch the show as a kid because my parents thought it wouldn’t be a good influence… and then they actually watched an episode. Every Sunday night after that became “Simpsons watching time” at the Kamb house.
With the season premiere right around the corner, I figured it’s time I finally did a post about the man, the myth, the moron: Homer J. Simpson.
Below are some of my favorite Homerisms and what we can learn from them in our epic quests to succeed.
Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers.
Although he’s trying to pass along some decent words of wisdom to Bart, Homer sounds like Bowser than Mario. He knows that life isn’t easy, that anything worth chasing is going to be difficult, but he’s really just too lazy to do it himself.
What we can learn – like with most things in life, it takes a dedicated effort to get in good shape and stay that way. If everybody could get really healthy with a magic pill (or by winning the lottery), nobody would appreciate the hard work that is usually required! When I see people busting their butts to get stronger and healthier, I smile. When I read about the newest miracle cure or watch the latest infomercial (shake weight anyone?) part of me dies inside. Doh!
Are you waiting for your number to be called? Do you keep talking about how you want to do this, or look like that, or have this, without ever actually doing something about it? Less yapping, more action. Go.
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Hilarious, but oh so wrong. In fact, failing is a huge part of success. Thomas Edison failed over a thousand times to find the right filament before inventing the light bulb. Each “failure” allowed him to cross one more material off the list of possibilities, getting him one step closer to finding the right one. Why was he eventually successful? Because he kept failing in different ways.
According to Albert Einstein, “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” If counting calories and running on a treadmill has failed you repeatedly in the past, what makes you think it’s actually going to work this time!? Why not try the Paleo diet and never count calories again? Have you considered a solid weight lifting routine, which has been shown to burn more calories and build way more muscle than just running for hours?
Mix it up, try different things, expect to fail, and use each failure as a “okay that didn’t work, onto the next thing!” The lesson is to not “never try,” but to repeatedly try over and over long as you’re trying different things.
Alright Brain, you don’t like me, and I don’t like you. But lets just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer.
Replace “Brain” with “Body” and I think we all can relate. If you’re just getting started on your quest for a healthier lifestyle, every day will be a fight against your body – it wants to sleep, it craves bad foods, it wants to cut workouts short, and it wants to keep doing what its been doing for decades. Unfortunately you don’t really get to pick a new partner – you have to work with the one you have. If you want to live a long life full of win, you need to play nice.
Try this – “Alright Body, you don’t like me, and I don’t like you. But let’s just do these workouts and start eating better, and I’ll be able to keep you around much longer and occasionally kill you with beer and bad food.”
Although I’m currently following the Paleo Diet for my meals on the current 28-Day Challenge, I still eat unhealthy food every once and a while. Yesterday I ate pizza and drank beer at a bar, and it was awesome. I work out consistently and 95% of my meals are healthy, which means I can eat bad foods on the weekend guilt-free.
Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.
If you’ve been reading Nerd Fitness for a while, you know that there are certain things that I (and the NF Rebel Army) truly believe in:
- Lift weights – more efficient than straight cardio at burning calories and will help you maintain muscle
- Eat better – Get rid of liquid calories, cut out processed carbs and start eating real foods
- Be consistent – you’re not dieting, you’re making changes that will last a lifetime
- Have a purpose – set goals, train with conviction, and stay on target
Every article I write probably can be traced back to one or more of these ideals. I can certainly teach you how to lift weights, I can teach you what to eat and what not to eat, and I can provide you with tips and strategies for how to make life-long changes.
What I can’t do is give you a reason to care – that’s gotta come from you.
When I see somebody who is struggling to succeed, I see somebody who hasn’t found his/her “reason to care” yet. One day, things will click, that reason will make itself known, and success will soon follow. NF reader Matt just woke up one day, decided he wanted to get in shape, and lost 160 pounds in twelve months. Tony thought he was having a heart attack, went out for a walk, and now runs marathons and half-marathons almost weekly.
Maybe it’s for your first kid being born. Maybe it’s your doctor telling you how much longer he expects you to live. Maybe it’s because you got cut from your high school basketball team (that was my reason). Once you know your “why,” the “how” part becomes remarkably easier.
Have you found your reason to care yet?
Other great quotes
Now, just because these aren’t part of the article’s overall theme doesn’t mean they’re not great. Here are a few more Homer Simpson quotes that everybody should know:
I’m not normally a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman!
There’s so much I don’t know about astrophysics! I wish I read that book by that wheelchair guy.
You can’t keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once, and move on.
In this house, we OBEY the laws of thermodynamics!
Don’t eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them.
Here’s to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all life’s problems.
Good things don’t end in ‘eum’, they end in ‘mania’… or ‘teria’.
Well, it’s 1am. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids.
Homer’s the man. He’s dumb as a brick, often neglects his family, and drinks far beyond a healthy amount, but he means well. Do we have any other Simpsons fans out there? Any other Homerisms that I missed?