Real-Life Role Playing: What is Your Profession?

What do you want to be when you grow up?

Today, let’s delve deep into the nerd aspect of Nerd Fitness and turn life into a giant role-playing game.  Why?  Because it’s damn fun, nerdy, and quite applicable.  If you’ve played World of Warcraft, Everquest, Final Fantasy, or practically any fantasy-based RPG this article will feel right at home.

If you have no clue what I’m talking about, this will still be a fun exercise for you.

Let’s get started.

Your Race is Already Determined

Before you pick your profession, let’s talk about your “race.” Every RPG always has elves, hobbits, ogres, trolls, humans, wood elves, night elves, etc.  Each race has their own particular attributes that make them who they are.  Take a look in the mirror RIGHT NOW.  That’s your race.  300 pounds overweight, 50 pounds underweight, average, tall, short, beer gut, 6-pack abs, etc.  These are attributes about yourself that you cannot change immediately, so that’s your starting point.  Depending on your “race,” certain professions will be easier or harder for you to obtain.

Here’s an example: If you are an ogre (really tall and quite overweight), it’s going to be more work for you to become a really good Assassin (Parkour traceur), but if you’re willing to put the time in, anything is possible.  Maybe you’re an elf (incredibly thin) and you want to be a super-strong Warrior.  You’re going to need to spend months and months eating insane amounts of calories and lifting heavy weights to get results, but it is possible.

Make sense? Good!  Let’s check out the different professions.

Warrior

Lego Warrior

This tank is incredibly strong and powerful, pushing weight like it’s his job.

Which is good, because it IS his job.  If you ever see any battle, warriors are the first responders, defending their party while attacking the enemy.  Strong as an ox, Warriors constantly try to push themselves to be bigger, better, stronger.  Eating and lifting are the only two things Warriors worry about.  You do NOT want to go punch for punch with a Warrior.  You will get destroyed.

Primary attributes: Strength, power

Training: Pure strength-building weight training.

Real life example: Any World’s Strongest Man competitor.

Scout

Lego Scout

Scouts can cover great distances in a short amount of time.

Built for distance and efficiency rather than strength and power, these guys can outlast any animal on the planet.  They eat a diet higher in carbohydrates than most (though they can still be healthy carbs!) to give them enough fuel to survive these grueling treks cross-country, and their muscles are designed to last for hours rather than minutes or seconds (like a Warrior).  A growing contingent of scouts have moved to barefoot running, returning to their ancient ancestral roots.

Primary attributes: Stamina, endurance.

Training: Lots of distance training, long bike rides, high volume exercises with any sort of weight training.

Real life example: Marathon runners, Ironman athletes.

Ranger

Ranger Lego

Rangers are a hybrid of Warriors and Scouts, built for strength AND endurance.

A jack-of-all-trades but master of none, Rangers are well-equipped for any situation.  Their weight training revolves around varying the reps, sets, and downtime to continually force those body to adapt to new situations.  Usually Rangers follow a Paleo Diet, eating things that can only be found in nature.  Thanks to this type of training and diet, Rangers have incredibly low body-fat percentages.

Primary attributes: Functional strength, adaptability.

Training: Lots of weight training but with minimal downtime (think crossfit and 300 training).

Real Life example: Gerard Butler in 300.

Assassin

Lego Assassin

To assassins, the world is one giant playground.

Every building can be climbed, every gap can be jumped, every obstacle can be conquered.  Assassins spend most of their time training with functional body weight exercises as that’s usually the only thing they need to lift.

Fearless, calculated, and efficient, Assassins have low body fat percentages because extra weight could mean the difference between life and death on a mission.  They have solid endurance as well, allowing them to progress through an obstacle-filled environment without breaking a sweat.

Primary Attributes: Agility, stamina

Training: Parkour, free running, rock climbing.

Real World example: Parkour traceurs, free runners, most athletes on Ninja Warrior.

Monk

Lego Monk

This isn’t the type of monk you’d want to run into on a bad day…

These monks can kick your ass with their fists and feet, and they will do it before you even knew what happened.  Incredibly agile, lightning fast, and loaded with power, Monks specialize in martial arts to stay in shape and destroy the opposition.

Training is mostly spent in dojos and in the ring, with some weight training thrown in to help produce stronger punches and kicks.  Monks only carry enough weight and muscle to provide maximum efficiency with each attack.  Muscles are compact and powerful, core strength is high, and speed is favored over size.

Primary Attributes: Agility, power

Training: MMA, Capoeria, Muay Thai boxing, Tai Kwon Do

Real life example:Georges St. Pierre (MMA fighter).

Druid

Lego Druid

Druids are one with nature.

Oftentimes consuming a plant-only diet, they specialize in being one with themselves, finding balance in everything.  These peaceful folk spend a majority of their time training in the arts of yoga, meditation, and tai chi.  Strength training is only done if necessary, as  most druids aren’t interested in massive muscles or explosive power.  Druids also follow a minimalist diet, high in vegetables, fruits, and nuts.  Some eat meat, but only enough to get sufficient protein.  Processed foods are the enemy.

Primary attributes: agility, flexibility

Training: meditation, yoga, tai chi

Real life example: Yogis, tai chi instructors

My Profession

Lego Berserker

I was born an elf (thin, tough to build muscle), and I want to be a Warrior/Ranger hybrid…let’s call it a Berzerker class?

I’m generally a pretty happy, calm, goofy guy.  But when I’m in training mode, I turn on berserker mode: I start foaming at the mouth, I walk around with this crazy look in my eye, and I push myself hard than I ever thought possible.

I focus on lift like squats, deadlifts, presses, handstand push ups, pull ups, dips, and chin ups.  I vary my rep range and downtime between sets to build strength, power, and muscle size.  I mix in assassin (gymnastics) training and monk (capoeira) training whenever possible.

Sure, it’d be a much quicker path for me to become a scout (as I already have the body type), but I love getting stronger and training in things that I truly enjoy, so I picked a different direction.

Why?

Because I can, and because it makes me happy.

How About You?

Profession

Leave a comment with your current race and what profession you’d like to be. 

I picked six classes up above to keep things simple, but let me know if I left out one that should be in there.  Feel free to combine two classes like I did as well.  Just so we’re clear: all classes are gender-neutral, so you can be a female warrior or male druid.  There are no restrictions!

Once you have your profession selected, feel free to join us in the Nerd Fitness message boards (it’s free!) and join up with your guild!  

Want to take things a step further?  

Check out the Nerd Fitness Academy, where you can actually pick your class, complete quests, gain experience, and yes…level up!

So, I ask you: “What is your PROFESSION!?”

-Steve

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Photo: KennyMatic, Lego berserkerWarrior Lego, Scout Lego, Ranger Legos, Druid Lego, Lego Assassin, Lego Monk, Lego Profession

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  • ButterflyJane

    I definitely see myself as a druid

  • Micah Bedwell

    Druid definitely. I have lived in a Buddhist seminary, practice meditation, Qigong, run, and do body-weight work.

  • Caleb

    I just joined, I think I’d be considered a half human half hobbit. I’m just a little stocky with some gut, but the rest of me looks relatively thin. I’m also kinda short, at 5’4 1/2″, and about 155 LB. I don’t quite think I’m full hobbit though, I look pretty thin, so I’m told.

    I really want to be a Warrior/Monk. Being a dancer and aspiring martial artist, core strength and dexterity are pretty important to me, but I really like the idea of being super strong, so I feel like it would be a good motivator. I like to hope I’ll end up like Bruce Lee someday. It’s a pretty high goal, but it keeps me motivated! I’ve never really committed to an exercise routine before, and have a tendency to eat junk and skip meals, so this is going to be a big adjustment for me, but I think I’m really ready. Wish me luck!

  • Aleexia Woodlesproggin

    I think of myself as a Hobbit. Short, overweight, overeat and do anything to avoid “adventure” (exercise). I want to become a Scout!

  • acemeister990

    Well I’m 6’2″ but scrawny. Bulk has never been easy but good tone runs in the family. So I’m elf I guess and am working to ranger status.

  • Pumkin

    This post is so legit. Im not really positive what race I am (other than just an average human haha) maybe someone could help? Im 5 foot 6 and about 250lbs give or take.

    I really want to be a scout, or maybe a scout/assasin/druid mix. Im still deciding. I really enjoy running because of the sense of freedom, also, no one bugs a running person. However, I get discouraged when running because im very out of shape and cant last longer than a minute, and thats on my good days. Also, seeing and feeling all the jigglyness of my body while running is very discouraging..

    My goal is to be able to run 2 miles nonstop by graduation in may. I plan on working out to train my stamina and endurance just until winter comes so I dont have to worry about heat stroke or snakes.. then ill start running (or jogging at first)

    Is anyone else super excited to turn their life into a real life video game? I know I am!!

  • Nitestalker5

    I would fall on the same or similar level to Steve as being born an Elf. I have always been skinny with a more difficult time building bulk. I have the athletic body type and would consider my class goal to be a hybrid of the Assassin/Ranger with perhaps the addition of Monk in the future. I enjoy biking and running once I have gotten back into it and have a little endurance built up and the same goes with the parkour and gymnastics elements. My typical workouts lately are in the gym with weight training so I feel like I fit in the ranger class for workout and preference with a cross over into assassin. I’ve never participated in any form of martial arts more than a standard defensive tactics, so I would like to add that subclass in the future.

  • kallianhawke

    After discussing it with my husband who has more experience with RPGs than I do, my race would be human because I’ve always been average. Average/medium build, average/medium height, etc., but I’m currently about 25 lbs overweight. I am most interested in the Monk class because I really like the idea of being able to defend myself and kick some ass if necessary. However, I’m currently following the path of a warrior since I’ve been focusing heavily on strength training, particularly heavy lifting. Down the road, I can see myself becoming a monk/assassin/ranger hybrid because I’m noticing that I enjoy testing my boundaries and seeing myself make progress. I like the feeling of throwing a punch or a kick, and I also want to be able to perform a skin-the-cat as well as a handstand pushup.

  • kallianhawke

    I definitely know how you feel when you talk about your body jiggling being discouraging! I had such a hard time getting past that because I was very self conscious when I first started working out and I knew what i looked like on that row machine in the gym or in the midst of free weights.

    Just keep with it! The jiggling will become less obvious until it goes away completely, but it’s a long journey… But it WILL happen! I promise!

  • Pumkin

    Aww that made my day :) Such an awkward feeling trying to exercise but it feels like everyone is staring at your jigglyness! I definitely plan on going to a gym at one point, but ill wait (and get in better shape!!) until I move, itd be best that way.

    Did you lose all the weight you wanted and get in shape? Im really curious.. if so, what did you do? What made you finally say “im done with this, its time”? Im really interested to hear your story, even if it isnt complete yet. :)

  • Billie.Baker

    I think I am a Scout; I haven’t built myself up to be able to run fast in a short time yet, but I can jog or cycle at a steady pace for a long time.
    However, I do have experience as a Monk and Druid- I practice Taekwondo and Dance a while ago. I kinda still have it, but not as good as it used to be (but I want it back!)

  • Lindsay E. Shutting

    I am currently a cat-woman–but the lack of confidence in my skills causes me to perform cautiously within the world. I suppose if my skills were optimally developed I’d be an Assassin. However, I train like a ranger/monk.

    My soul is full of light and I tend to show mercy to those who err–but not because of timidity. My nature is sometimes complicated and seemingly contradictory. I am content to sit, read, and pray upon the treetops and highest peaks, but my Commander sends me out as a messenger to do things frequently beyond my comfort zone.

    My favorite creature is the dolphin. One day I will have an army of dolphins who will see no warfare as I will lead them in the way of peace. In that day, there will be no fear upon the earth, and freedom from pain will reign.

  • Wolf

    What race would be short slightly overweight but not obese, with broad muscled shoulders but little to other muscle to be spoken of? Oh and I want to be a Spartan!

  • https://www.facebook.com/tonycan2 Tony Cantu

    Scout/Assassin hybrid!

  • Chinmay Krishnan Kadannamanna

    I guess i’m an elf and i would like to be an assasin/ranger hybrid…
    I don’t know how I’m gonna do it as I’m weak, as weak as it gets……help, anyone?

  • http://joyouscalling.blogspot.com KK

    I’m an elf and I would like to be an assassin/monk (aka Ninja). I’ve already been grudgingly admitted to be a Ninja – Second Class (because I’m sneaky – we also won’t discuss the credentials of those who instated me), but I really want to level up and become a silent terror.

  • MotherDam

    Hi so I’m a, well I really don’t know what I am other then about 50 lbs over my goal weight and have no energy other then to run after 4 kids. I’m going to work towards being and Adventurer then possibly upgrade to Scout. I have two years left until my littlest starts school, after which I want to run and compeat in mud runs and other fun things.

  • Terri Morse

    I’m currently a warrior and I love weight training! But I’d like to have more stamina so a Warrior/Scout hybrid would be great!

  • Princess Amy-Pants

    Alright alright, serious question here: What is the best profession for a hobbit? I mean, A REAL HOBBIT! I’m 5’3 and 150lbs, but more than being short and puffy, I LOVE FOOD. I love parties (not wild crazy ones, you know, hobbit-y like ones.) My favorite things to do are take walks, read books, be outside, visit with friends, and eat eat eat. I won’t eat just anything- no, I like growing my own food and making my own food because I enjoy it more than way. I love enjoying life. What kind of profession goes with that??

  • Keltab

    Wow – you sound almost the opposite of me! We may have to keep track of each other just to help push each of us to whatever is the next step :) Read my post and see what I mean…

  • Keltab

    Hello All! After many years as a troll (even played one many years ago for a long-running game of Chivalry and Sorcery) I am ready to evolve. Currently 6’5″ and 322 pounds. I am happy with my height, but not my weight : ) I plan on transforming myself from troll to Ranger/Druid. I love being outside, and wildlife and landscape photography help me want to change who I am – or at least my race. I was an athlete in school, but have since let some of life’s challenges knock me down. Time to get up and prove to myself that I can be much more like I want to be instead of who I currently appear to be. Until now, I could (and usually would) eat anything, and in large quantities. I heard myself joking one day “you don’t get to be my size or shape being picky or turning down food”. That shocked the snot out of me. After cleaning my face, I thought “When did I become a joke to myself?” Shocking, and that led me here. I look forward to becoming the Ranger/Druid I have always wanted to be… interesting in a way since my nickname in high school and college was “Strider”.

  • Nolan Pugh

    Started off as a short elf, not much muscle but strength and endurance from pure willpower. Now I’ve got some muscle on me from working out at home for a few years and tons of endurance. I’m also an experienced martial artist so I guess I’m already a monk. I’d like to ideally be a ranger/assassin/monk hybrid.

  • Catherine

    I’m a… mithra (FF reference) and I guess I want to be a Monk/Assassin hybrid. I actually want to start training for self-defense (hence the monk part), but need to develop my stamina and endurance (hence assassin or, possibly, scout). I’m a total wimp though, so parkour strikes me as really daunting.

  • QT3.14

    Is height for race calculated by age? what exactly are the differences between an assassin and a druid?

  • Ana H

    I’m currently an ogre looking to become a bad-ass assassin…. I’ve got my work cut out for me!

  • Shawn Bell

    Your probably a dwarf

  • Mary S

    Hi all. I guess I’m an Ogre. 5’9″ and 270 lb. I want to be a Monk/Druid hybrid as my profession. Goal is to get down to 160 lb. and more speed and stamina than I have now.) I have a lot of work to do to get there. (I can dream of being an Assassin later…baby steps…)

  • Blake Cauthen

    I’m at a loss for a race. I’m 5’11 but all torso with short arms and legs (29in inseam). Even my hands and feet are a bit small. I would have to describe my body type as a tall Dwarf. Ranger assassin monk? Does that make a paladin? I lift weights as a gym is my most convenient option but I find more motivation in rock climbing, kayaking, and heavy bag training. I recently added a sledgehammer to my workouts. I feel like it makes more sense to develop practical muscle, meaning making normal movements the best they can be. IRL I am a law enforcement officer so running, boxing/grappling, and hiking are the norms for daily activity.

  • Bharat

    How Do I decide my Race?

  • Victoria Clemmons

    Race: Human (really heavy human, but human)

    Class: Druid/monk hybrid

  • Kathy Kline

    I am there with you. Hobbit all the way. 5’2 at least 170 probably more. I want to be an assassin/druid hybrid. It’s all about my body right. I can eat but if my goal is to be able to lift my own body weight (assassin) I will have to make choices like forgo third breakfast to start! ;) no more mindlessness.(druid) good luck, going for my 10 min walk. I am not even on a level yet! Lol

  • Elisa

    I’m going to aim for a Druid/Scout hybrid, but I don’t really know what race I am. So far I’m neither an ogre nor an elf…I guess I need more descriptions?

  • Robert Montoya

    I’m an Ogre and I’d like to be a Monk with the Stamina of a Ranger. That possible?

  • Joseph Martinez

    I’m a warrior/scout/assassin

  • Terrence Cummings

    I am most likely a warrior. 300 lbs and 6’4″. But I would like to be a monk/assassin hybrid, strong yet agile and flexible. Working out doesn’t come naturally and I usually taper off about a month after starting. Hopefully I can do this right this time.

  • Windwarrior

    Steve,
    Currently I would consider myself jaba the hut but I am in the progress of transforming into an assassin ranger hybrid

  • Kuhn

    I am an Ogre. My profession has almost always been couch potato/Gamer. I want to achieve not the impossible, but the unlikely. I want to become if not a human, than a devilishly handsome ogre. My new profession path is Monk/Assassin. Some of my best memories of being younger were climbing around on things i had no reason to be climbing on, and fighting with my brothers. We used to fight for hours, i never really thought of it as exercise, but how sweaty and fatigued we got makes it make a whole lot more sense now. Getting involved in some training for fighting might be a really good change of pace for me, as i hate running and doing mundane workouts. Also i want to start Parkour it has always looked so fun to me. I love to watch them do something and then think to myself “I would have done it this way, to be more efficient.” The only reason i have never done these things is because i got fat, really fat. Then i got lazy. Netfix marathons are a normal for me. I started running 3 times a week with my dog, we are on a Couch-to-5K course. I really hate running, but i have to do this to prove to myself that i’m not a couch potato, and that i can do whatever i set my mind to. This might be the hardest thing i’ve ever done in my life for myself, but i’m doing it. And when i get done, the satisfaction that i have from completing my goal will be worth all of the sweat, sore muscles, and mornings i just don’t feel like getting out of bed. I don’t believe i will ever look back and think “I wish i could just do nothing instead”. Monk/Assassin, here i come.

  • Bartek Ostrowski

    I’ve had so much fun reading your post :D

    Personally, I want to create well-rounded, strong with mind and body character. Im doing calisthenics, running, some crossfit stuff, and also martial arts. I want to be prepared for everything, so my training must be well-balanced;) Lets put it straight: My class is soldier. Hope that in future I will be able to choose additional class: special forces operator ;D

    P.S Sorry for my english, still learning :D

  • BestHobbitEver

    I’d say I’m a hobbit and my goal is a ranger/monk hybrid

  • Danny Brophy

    I think my race is Elf not sure tho im relatively normal in size but never actually gained any muscle due to never lifting or anything before so maybe im human… either way I want to be an assassin class mixed with maybe a little Scout but my main goal is to learn Parkour so its definitely assassin class.

  • Amy Inkster

    Deal! I just got on the forums, under princessamypants. I’m starting out in the adventure guild until I find better footing. Find me on there!

  • Jimmy

    I’d say I’m probably an elf, since I’m about 1,80m tall and my mass lies below 70kg (metric system really is better, believe me guys), and the classes which most appeal to me are the scout and the monk, maybe also the assassin. I think those 3 should make for a fairly solid combination. Also I would already consider myself a decent fighter (several years Wing Chun Kung-Fu), but I’d really like to dig deeper into that; as well as improve my running and climbing skills.
    I appreciate this post a lot, since it helped me get a clearer viewpoint about which skills I’d like to develop and which are less important to me.

  • Corey Pyland

    If you’d have asked me 15 years ago, and almost 150 lbs. ago, I would have told you that I was an obvious Ranger coming into my prime. At 6’5 I came in at 180 soaking wet, with hardly any body fat or coordination to speak of. I was a tall, clumsy, typical teenage nerd. But something happened soon after…a gradual shift was taking place. Once my mind finally regained control of my body, I found my coordination, and my body began discovering that my bone structure could handle much more muscle mass. Without working out or watching my diet, I morphed into a beast of a man. I was told on numerous occasions that I didn’t know my own strength, and I didn’t. I could lift and move things that most people couldn’t budge. I loved it…the gangly nerd now turned Hulk. But the years catch up, and now I find myself a married father of 2, staring at 325 lbs on the scale in disbelief. The invincibility of my youth now seen as stupidity, as I begin to feel the aches and pains of squandered years. But it is not the end. Only the opportunity for rebirth. I can be more of a Hulk than I ever dreamed. I can define the popular term Beast Mode. I have the heart for it…but do I have the drive…the willpower…the commitment. Can I turn from the comfort of the soul food that has slowly constricted my potential like a hypnotizing serpent? Can I push past the behemoth of distractions and excuses? Can I defeat the limitation my own mind and body has convinced me that I cannot defeat? Of course I can…with the help of this fellowship. I know I can…because I AM A WARRIOR!!!

  • CBrozer

    I think I’m an elf, and I want to be an assassin ranger hybrid, and Idk what to do. ( I’m also twelve years old, so any help for youngsters would be awesome!)

  • ironwolf9876

    I just found this website and I think this may be exactly what I need. As far as race goes I’m thinking I am probably a Dwarf. 5’7″, 265 pounds, broad and strong with a gut that I need to get rid of. I also laugh when I think of Dwarfs hating to run as that is pretty much my thought on the whole process. I would like to train to be a warrior as I think that is probably the best bang for my buck considering the strength is already there. Just need to do more and lose this weight.

    Good luck on your journeys everyone!

  • Anonymous

    I think that i am an elf. I strive to become an assassin.

  • Holly Sippel

    Hi I’m Holly. I’d say I’m mostly a ranger since I run trails mostly, although I do have some druid aspirations as I enjoy Tai Chi and yoga. Am 5’5″ & 149#, so I have a bit of work to do. I cross train on elliptical& stairs and lift weight at the gym, in winter I don’t do as much outdoor running. Ran my first marathon about 2 weeks ago. I work 6 nites/week as an RN.

  • Jack de forêt

    I’m probably closer to a dwarf, shorter and fat. I’d like to be a ranger, though.