Real-Life Role Playing: What is Your Profession?

What do you want to be when you grow up?

Today, let’s delve deep into the nerd aspect of Nerd Fitness and turn life into a giant role-playing game.  Why?  Because it’s damn fun, nerdy, and quite applicable.  If you’ve played World of Warcraft, Everquest, Final Fantasy, or practically any fantasy-based RPG this article will feel right at home.

If you have no clue what I’m talking about, this will still be a fun exercise for you.

Let’s get started.

Your Race is Already Determined

Before you pick your profession, let’s talk about your “race.” Every RPG always has elves, hobbits, ogres, trolls, humans, wood elves, night elves, etc.  Each race has their own particular attributes that make them who they are.  Take a look in the mirror RIGHT NOW.  That’s your race.  300 pounds overweight, 50 pounds underweight, average, tall, short, beer gut, 6-pack abs, etc.  These are attributes about yourself that you cannot change immediately, so that’s your starting point.  Depending on your “race,” certain professions will be easier or harder for you to obtain.

Here’s an example: If you are an ogre (really tall and quite overweight), it’s going to be more work for you to become a really good Assassin (Parkour traceur), but if you’re willing to put the time in, anything is possible.  Maybe you’re an elf (incredibly thin) and you want to be a super-strong Warrior.  You’re going to need to spend months and months eating insane amounts of calories and lifting heavy weights to get results, but it is possible.

Make sense? Good!  Let’s check out the different professions.

Warrior

Lego Warrior

This tank is incredibly strong and powerful, pushing weight like it’s his job.

Which is good, because it IS his job.  If you ever see any battle, warriors are the first responders, defending their party while attacking the enemy.  Strong as an ox, Warriors constantly try to push themselves to be bigger, better, stronger.  Eating and lifting are the only two things Warriors worry about.  You do NOT want to go punch for punch with a Warrior.  You will get destroyed.

Primary attributes: Strength, power

Training: Pure strength-building weight training.

Real life example: Any World’s Strongest Man competitor.

Scout

Lego Scout

Scouts can cover great distances in a short amount of time.

Built for distance and efficiency rather than strength and power, these guys can outlast any animal on the planet.  They eat a diet higher in carbohydrates than most (though they can still be healthy carbs!) to give them enough fuel to survive these grueling treks cross-country, and their muscles are designed to last for hours rather than minutes or seconds (like a Warrior).  A growing contingent of scouts have moved to barefoot running, returning to their ancient ancestral roots.

Primary attributes: Stamina, endurance.

Training: Lots of distance training, long bike rides, high volume exercises with any sort of weight training.

Real life example: Marathon runners, Ironman athletes.

Ranger

Ranger Lego

Rangers are a hybrid of Warriors and Scouts, built for strength AND endurance.

A jack-of-all-trades but master of none, Rangers are well-equipped for any situation.  Their weight training revolves around varying the reps, sets, and downtime to continually force those body to adapt to new situations.  Usually Rangers follow a Paleo Diet, eating things that can only be found in nature.  Thanks to this type of training and diet, Rangers have incredibly low body-fat percentages.

Primary attributes: Functional strength, adaptability.

Training: Lots of weight training but with minimal downtime (think crossfit and 300 training).

Real Life example: Gerard Butler in 300.

Assassin

Lego Assassin

To assassins, the world is one giant playground.

Every building can be climbed, every gap can be jumped, every obstacle can be conquered.  Assassins spend most of their time training with functional body weight exercises as that’s usually the only thing they need to lift.

Fearless, calculated, and efficient, Assassins have low body fat percentages because extra weight could mean the difference between life and death on a mission.  They have solid endurance as well, allowing them to progress through an obstacle-filled environment without breaking a sweat.

Primary Attributes: Agility, stamina

Training: Parkour, free running, rock climbing.

Real World example: Parkour traceurs, free runners, most athletes on Ninja Warrior.

Monk

Lego Monk

This isn’t the type of monk you’d want to run into on a bad day…

These monks can kick your ass with their fists and feet, and they will do it before you even knew what happened.  Incredibly agile, lightning fast, and loaded with power, Monks specialize in martial arts to stay in shape and destroy the opposition.

Training is mostly spent in dojos and in the ring, with some weight training thrown in to help produce stronger punches and kicks.  Monks only carry enough weight and muscle to provide maximum efficiency with each attack.  Muscles are compact and powerful, core strength is high, and speed is favored over size.

Primary Attributes: Agility, power

Training: MMA, Capoeria, Muay Thai boxing, Tai Kwon Do

Real life example:Georges St. Pierre (MMA fighter).

Druid

Lego Druid

Druids are one with nature.

Oftentimes consuming a plant-only diet, they specialize in being one with themselves, finding balance in everything.  These peaceful folk spend a majority of their time training in the arts of yoga, meditation, and tai chi.  Strength training is only done if necessary, as  most druids aren’t interested in massive muscles or explosive power.  Druids also follow a minimalist diet, high in vegetables, fruits, and nuts.  Some eat meat, but only enough to get sufficient protein.  Processed foods are the enemy.

Primary attributes: agility, flexibility

Training: meditation, yoga, tai chi

Real life example: Yogis, tai chi instructors

My Profession

Lego Berserker

I was born an elf (thin, tough to build muscle), and I want to be a Warrior/Ranger hybrid…let’s call it a Berzerker class?

I’m generally a pretty happy, calm, goofy guy.  But when I’m in training mode, I turn on berserker mode: I start foaming at the mouth, I walk around with this crazy look in my eye, and I push myself hard than I ever thought possible.

I focus on lift like squats, deadlifts, presses, handstand push ups, pull ups, dips, and chin ups.  I vary my rep range and downtime between sets to build strength, power, and muscle size.  I mix in assassin (gymnastics) training and monk (capoeira) training whenever possible.

Sure, it’d be a much quicker path for me to become a scout (as I already have the body type), but I love getting stronger and training in things that I truly enjoy, so I picked a different direction.

Why?

Because I can, and because it makes me happy.

How About You?

Profession

Leave a comment with your current race and what profession you’d like to be. 

I picked six classes up above to keep things simple, but let me know if I left out one that should be in there.  Feel free to combine two classes like I did as well.  Just so we’re clear: all classes are gender-neutral, so you can be a female warrior or male druid.  There are no restrictions!

Once you have your profession selected, feel free to join us in the Nerd Fitness message boards (it’s free!) and join up with your guild!  

Want to take things a step further?  

Check out the Nerd Fitness Academy, where you can actually pick your class, complete quests, gain experience, and yes…level up!

So, I ask you: “What is your PROFESSION!?”

-Steve

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Photo: KennyMatic, Lego berserkerWarrior Lego, Scout Lego, Ranger Legos, Druid Lego, Lego Assassin, Lego Monk, Lego Profession

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  • nicholas fotou

    I would say that I am a scout blended with druid.

  • Random Person

    I’m naturally an “elf”, petite and never weighing more than 115 lbs. soaking wet. I better use that to my advantage and aim to be a scout/assasin who can kick some butt (krav maga style).

  • Emily B.

    I think I’m a ranger, but I’m not planning on doing the paleo diet for right now. I wish there was an article talking about what defines the different races. I would like to know what race I would be.

  • TSS

    What profession does Daniel Craig’s Bond lie in? I choose that profession.

  • Tyrannus

    I’m 5 ft 6 and around 155 pounds.. Human I guess and probably belong in the Scout class (lvl 1 of course – can do lots of walking, but not much running). Trying to change classes to warrior or monk. Probably want to end up as a hybrid of all three xD A warrior/monk/scout hybrid would be badass.

  • RJ Baker

    I believe my profession is a mix of warrior/ranger. With a little bit of assassin thrown in cuz apparently I’m good at sneaking up on ppl. Love strength training, martial arts and archery. I have a stocky build for a female. Glad I found this place.

  • Gail Chan

    I’m a Druid. Predominantly vegetarian.

  • Luis Sousa

    I’m an elf and i wanted to be a monk/assassin, i’m skinny but have lack of muscle and more fat that i wish i had and i wish i could build a strong body and endurance, since i play drums and would love to practice mma and a lot of other martial arts

  • gilad eluz

    So, I’m an Ogre (:|) and warrior seems to fit me.
    Heh.
    #Tanks4lyfe

  • scar495

    I am rather small. I’m actually getting close to underweight, four pounds left and I could feel what little muscle I had dwindling, that’s what brought me to nerd fitness as I was losing weight rapidly with a clean diet and HIIT, but staying squishy. I decided to look into bodyweight training, and I’ve stopped dropping pounds, yay! I wouldn’t say I’m quite an elf. More like a half-elf. I have no trouble gaining and was pretty buxom at one point. My first instinct in choosing a profession is to go with warrior because who the eff doesn’t love Xena!? But, my goals tend to be more in the wiry and lean and fast category, And I am basically trying to train myself for apocalypse scenarios. It’s silly, but it’s hella motivation. and I am greatly interested in learning martial arts, tai chi specifically for the anger management benefits. So, I would say Ranger is my chosen class, as I’m not looking to master a martial art, and Will dabble in many things on my journey through life.

  • K-Chan

    I think I am either a human or an elf, but either way I’d like to be a Monk. I’ve already taken a class in Tae Kwon Do and loved it, and when I thought about what I would want to specialize in, it was agility/strength. I look forward to training more in that area. Thanks for this post, it’s really helpful!

  • Rick

    I’m 25 pounds overweight but I get winded extremely fast. I have very low stamina and my diet and exercise is an absolute mess if its even there.

    I want to be a Ranger/Assassin hybrid that I will call Hunter from now on.

    LETS DO THIS!

  • doodles

    Hey guys, I’m just starting here. I’m a skinny elf, with a bit of a tummy and thighs. I’m a wannabe hybrid, of a monk and an assassin. :D