Our relationship with time is broken.
Let’s talk about it.
Whether we’re trying to build muscle, lose weight, write a book, or complete any major task…it’s going to take longer than we want.
Have you heard of Hofstadter’s Law? It states that “everything will take longer than expected, even when factoring in Hofstadter’s Law.”
It’s also called the “Planning Fallacy”. No matter how much we plan, even when we plan for things to take a long time, they’ll take longer than expected!
My friend (and behavioral productivity guru) Nir Eyal, author of Indistractable, says tasks often take three times longer than we expect them to.
Tasks take longer than we want, which is already a problem. The same can be true for our goals.
We then compound the problem because we’re also more impatient than we’ve ever been:
- Netflix drops whole seasons of addictive TV shows at once, which means we’ll watch a 10-episode season in a weekend.
- We listen to podcasts and audiobooks at 3x speed so we can listen to even more podcasts and audiobooks to try and shrink our ever-expanding list.
- We try to lose weight fast. We try to build muscle fast. Of course, by going fast, we end up injured, burned out, and right back where we started.
We need to change our relationship with time.
It starts with self-compassionate acceptance. Once we understand the process will take longer than expected, we can rethink our approach.
Here’s what that means for me:
- What I’m doing HAS to be sustainable. Whether it takes 6 months or 12 months, I want to feel like it’s something I can do regularly without feeling burned out. This generally means doing LESS, setting lower goals, and prioritizing consistency without burnout.
- My environment matters more than I want to believe. Over time, we will probably revert back to our old ways, because that’s just what humans do. And I know my environment affects me more than anything else. So when I’m tackling something new, I start by exploring how I can change my environment to support it.
- I try to make it fun. Whenever I struggle with doing something consistently, it’s usually because I just don’t enjoy it. But when I’m excited to do it – when it’s fun – it’s WAY easier to get started. This means picking forms of exercise that really make me happy or feel better about myself – walks, strength training, handstands. And even though there are still times I don’t love it in the moment, I love how I feel AFTER. That’s motivating for me.
If I focus on these things, I’m less concerned about how long the process takes.
Because no matter what timeline I pick, it’ll probably take longer than that!
-Steve
